Gratuitous pictures of the little man

Do you ever feel like your losing it?

Do you ever feel like your mind is losing all its mental capability?

Since I havent been in school fulltime in over 18 months and three weeks, not that I'm counting or anything, I feel like I'm becoming dumber. Now what I am about to say is extremely elitist and snobby but here goes: I have known that I am quite smart all my life. People have told me and my marks have reflected that. However, when I bombed the LSAT in February 2006, I felt completely worthless as a human. I have always been defined as "the smart one". I know that I have whined about this before. But it's really hard to deal with the fact that I'm not involved with the day to day activities of academia. The clubs, the rallies, the book signings, the lectures, the beers with your professor after class, the hanging around in the Classics office talking about the new piece of pottery I found that proves the thesis I have been working on for 9 months, the insular nature of it all. I miss it so much that I think this general malaise that has afflicted me for the past 6 months is directly attributed to my lack of academic involvement. However, I am determined. I have a conference at which I think I can be accepted for my classical thesis that I have been working on for what seems like an eternity. Also, I took out a record 32 books from the library - didnt know you could take out that many did ya? - and they are all part of an intensive regimen of "re-learning" or what I have called "The Re-Education of Janice Wonton." (btw that is my new nickname at work - at least they are not calling me spring roll anymore.) I have things to focus on and the LSAT and the applications dont seem so looming and dire now as they did even two days ago. And the funny thing is, I'm not so sure I even want to go to Law School anymore. Imagine that!

Hot fun in the summertime!

 

Ugh, I'm going to say this once

Yes I didnt get into law school my first time. And here's why.

1. I really didnt take the LSAT seriously. Foolish, non? Why didnt I take it seriously? Well, and this is not meant to be arrogant at all, I have always coasted through school, undergraduate included. So I figured the LSAT would be something else I could marginally study for, but not really, and just coast in there and get a kickass mark. I was wrong.
2. I dont know why the rest of my factors wouldnt have made up for the abysmal LSAT mark. But I am trying again.

I'm not telling you my LSAT marks so stop asking. If you have any tips for post grad admissions essays or post grad life at all, I am open and waiting. As for being depressed, surpringly, I'm not very. I mean I acknowledged almost instantly that my LSAT studying was lacking severly and have taken steps to correct that. As well, with the luxury of time, I am taking some distance ed courses to help my GPA, which although quite good, can always use some help. Also, I realize that there is only one thing that I am meant to do in this world and that is to gain a legal education. I cant explain why or how I realized this; it has always been a part of my psyche. It's funny when people ask "When did you decide to become a lawyer?" because in all honesty, I cant remember deciding. I just remember always KNOWING that I would be one. The road to law school has been a bit longer and has been riddled with pot holes of poor marks, months of waiting and a hope that one day with a little patience I too will do what I know I will excel at.

I was telling Mike that my experience with the LSAT has been a purely psychological test of strength and work ethic. For the first time in my life, I am being mentally tested. As well, my patience, minute by most standards, is also being tested. And for the first time ever, I feel dumb. At least dumber than all those people that were accepted this year. It's hard to explain but I have defined myself as being "the smart one" so when that title wasnt enough to gurantee myself a place in law school, I really had to examine how I categorized myself. I have realized that I am smart but unlike my friend Allison, I am not naturally smart and that at the ripe old age of 23, I actually have to start putting effort into my educational ventures. That being said, I am newly invigorated with this acknowledgement that my smarts have only carried me so far, and with some luck and much determination, I will be posting on here (in a years time) that I am on my way to law school.

That being said, it still is really hard to explain to most people that I didnt get in on my first try.

Reading update 2006

So remember last year when I said something like "I'm going to read alot of books blah blah blah" Well, you people should have warned me.

Reading books takes time kids. Now you know.

These are the books I committed to reading; some I have read and some I haven't. Deal with it.

1. The Divine Comedy: Read it. Loved it.
   
2. Pride and Prejudice: Havent read it. Deal with it.
   
3. The hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy: Havent' read it. Am on the waiting list at the library.
   
4. Harry potters: Read the first two, downloaded the rest as audiobooks. That counts right?
   
5. The Grapes of Wrath:
   
6. David Copperfield
7. Emma
8. Animal Farm
9. Of Mice and Men: Seriously, I hated it. Serious let-down. Ernest Hemingway is on notice.
   
10. Crime and Punishment
11. Memoirs of a Geisha: I havent read it yet. And no, it is not my auto biography.
    
12. Ulysses: Very Good. And by Very Good, I mean fantastic.
    
13. The Old Man and the Sea
14. The Age of Innocence
15. The Satanic Verses: Mike did me the favour of reading this book and declared "I dont see what all the fuss was about."
    
16. Mein Kampf: I have been told by my library that its on its way. Its been on its way for 6 months. I think the government is watching my library list.
    
17. The War of the Worlds: Havent read yet. In the words of Stephen Colbert, Deal with it.
    
18. Art of War: Read it. Loved it. Completely Relevant.
    
19. The Histories: L-O-V-E-D. Love it. Also surprsingly relevant for the insight it provides into modern crises and struggles.
    
20. Plutarch’s Lives: Again, interesting although Plutarch does take generous liberties, especially if you know the indepth actions of the people he dicusses.
    
21. History of the Peloponessian War: Very good. Very, very good. Can't say enough.
    
22. Leviathan
23. The Quran

Summer 2006

What have I been up to you ask..... Pictures to follow.

 

The Re-Education of Janice Sousa

As many of you may have ascertained over the years, I am not normal. In an effort to combat this, Mike has taken it upon himself to re-educate me, in the film sense. You see, every time we are out or someone mentions something about a movie from the 80s, I usually have not seen it. For a number of reasons, I didn’t watch movies during my childhood. In fact, the first movie I can recall watching was the Jetsons and I was 11. So when Mike says something wack, I usually have a vacant stare on my face since I haven’t seen the movie. Well, he’s doing everything in his power to correct this. Therefore in the next few entries I will be reviewing movies twenty years after the fact. I’m a little slow.

This week: Ghostbusters

However I’m going to be doing this in a list format. Type – A personality much?

1. Firstly, Ghostbusters was recognized by the Microsoft spellchecker. Weird no? That’s always a good sign!
2. The scene that sealed the deal for me was the final battle scene. You know the one in which the CGI graphics are so mind blowing you actually think they are fighting a primordial anger god? Actually, it looks more like when my little cousin is trying to imaginary kill his brother; at least that’s how realistic it looked.
3. Bill – Captain Zissou - Murray
4. The Stay Puff’d Man as the beacon of evil.
Dr. Peter Venkman: We've been going about this all wrong, this Mr. Stay Puft's okay, he's a sailor, he's in New York, we get this guy laid we won't have any trouble.
5. Rick Moranis. I’m slowing realizing he is the Jeff “I’m in Every Movie you’ve ever seen” Goldblum of the 80s.
6. The tagline: “They’re here to save the world.” I’m sooooooo jealous that’s copyrighted.
7. Line: “Ray, when someone asks you if you are God, you say yes!”
8. The theme song – your singing it right now, aren’t you?
9. Dr Ray Stantz: Everything was fine with our system until the power grid was shut off by dickless here.

Walter Peck: They caused an explosion!

Mayor: Is this true?

Dr. Peter Venkman: Yes it's true. [pause]

Dr. Peter Venkman: This man has no dick.

Walter Peck: Jeez! [Charges at Venkman]

Mayor: Break it up! Hey, break this up! Break it up!

Walter Peck: All right, all right, all right!

Dr. Peter Venkman: Well that's what I heard!